Why Am I Still Debating Over This?

I can't remember if I've already made a post like this... Hmmm... Anyways!

Good lord, this is driving me insane. I've been trying to decide (for years) whether to ride english or western... I can't pick, I just can't, I need help! So, hopefully this can help me decide over the two. I want your feedback also! I already asked Ava what she likes better and she many times said english. I think it's because english saddles fit her about a thousand times better. I've never found a western saddle that will leave an even sweat mark on her back whereas almost all english ones have. I've tried a lot of different western saddles too! It's weird. Ava has a short, wide back with high withers. So, it sounds like an easy answer, maybe it is.

Now I'd like to do some pros and cons about each.

English

Pros:

•Shape of saddle fits Ava a lot better

•LOVE the look of english saddles

•Pricing is a little easier for me

Cons:

 •I don't feel as secure in an english saddle (mainly because I hadn't ridden in one for a while)

•Usually have to mount up with a mounting block

Western

Pros:

•I feel more secure riding western

•The horn makes me feel safer

•Being able to get on without a mounting block

Cons:

•Can't find one saddle that will fit her (this is a big one)

•I can't afford a custom saddle. Not for a VERY long time

So, looks like they are opposite of each other. Western saddles won't fit but I feel secure in them whereas english saddles do fit but I don't feel as secure in them. I haven't ridden in an english saddle for a while so it would just take some getting used to. Hmm... Possibly english? All I want is to feel confident that she is comfortable while riding. I can't stand seeing those dry marks on her back anymore, it starting to drive me a little crazy!

As for showing I don't think Ava could get very far in anything. I would love to do jumping but she doesn't seem to like it; I would love to do reining, cutting, roping but she could never get to a high enough level. The only thing she would be good at is showmanship. Overall, I think she just wants to be my horse; take me on trail rides and adventures. I don't know, I could be completely wrong! Ava never tells me these things, haha!

Anyways, does anyone have any insight on this? Everything is certainly appreciated.